Finding a Voice

The world is loud.  There is so much vying for our attention.  Facebook feeds a frenzy of repressed social neglect and Twitter has cut our conversations to what we can squeeze into 140 characters or less.  We text in code because we’re too busy and distracted to say what we really mean. We build platforms and ideas, create blogs and spaces where words bleed and we wring ourselves dry counting comments and calculating stats.

There are days when I think that my writing has ceased to be the cathartic healing that I crave.  When words appear just for the sake of words.  Almost like a recalcitrant child tugging on your hem and begging your attention. The drone of repetition fills the air until my own voice, hoarse from being raised above the din, drowns in a sea of incoherence.

We lose our voice when we lose our heart. And hearts can be lost with an alarming ease.  Hearts need to be nourished, they need constant fuel and there are days when they need quiet.  Restorative rest that breathes new life into the parts of us that feed our creativity.  There are even times when we need to, just for a bit, silence our own voice so that we can listen intently to what is not being blared across our screens or in the doubts that careen out of control in our minds. 

There are moments we need to turn inward and harbour and hide our words and our thoughts deep in our hearts, fill every crevice, every fold with the whispers of the Spirit.  Each chamber full to the very brim, so that when our dreams beat there, they beat in time with God and our voice becomes one with His.  With the thrum of His holiness pulsing life into our dreams our voices become, not the grating or piercing call, but the steady and the true, the same voice as the calm that brought the wind to its knees and bent the waves in supplication to their Master. 

There will be days when you have no words.  When blank screens will mock you with their taunting glow.  There will be days when you feel like what you say, the words that do find their way out of the tips of your fingers, are garbage and worthy of only the recycling bin.  There will be days when you feel like you’ve been emptied out, every last bit of breath robbed from your lungs and you will begin to entertain the notion of laying your words aside.  There will be days, just like that and more.

And on those days, the crappy and the disjointed days, lay your head down on the cushion of your arm and let His calm breathe life into your heart.  It is there with your head bent, your palms open that you will find your voice once again. 

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